Sayings

Caleb and Amberly have started Awana this year. Caleb is a Spark and Amberly is a Cubbie. Amberly has done well learning her first memory verse which was "God loved us and sent his son." 1John4:10. She has also incorporated this verse into her daily conversations such as "Mommy loves me and sent my birth" or "I love my kitty and sent myself". There have been a few tunes also that she's been singing about this. Her new verse for this week is a variation of two "All have sinned" and "while we were sinners...Christ died for us" Sometimes sinners comes out as dancers or singers. But I think they would give it to her.

Caleb has been given 2 weeks to memorize John 3:16, which is a pretty long one for him to get at his age, but with success, we have done it and he's quite proud of himself.

They both manage to make me laugh when it comes to their chatter. Just tonight Caleb went into a very descriptive story of how he managed to get his underwear wet while pooping on the toilet. It was very detailed. So much so I won't repeat it. Amberly tells me all about her new best friend Linda at Sunday school, which her name isn't Linda, it's Lisa, she's her teacher but she's her best friend anyway. Also, she manages to talk a great deal about Cody and Jordan (teenagers) when they are there to help. I think she likes the boys.

Oh they are growing so fast, right before my eyes. I'm loving every moment of it. I love watching them build their personalities, their characters. I love them.

Mother Guilt

Today marks the last official day of my maternity leave. The emotions are swirling around, the fear sometimes catches a hold and the guilt continues to surround me so much that I'm struggling to climb up out of it. When birthing your baby, not only do you get the most amazing gift in the world, you also are handed over guilt. As a mom, I can't do anything without guilt not far from me. And tomorrow I enter back into the working world and guilt is beating the crap out of me. I keep reminding myself that it's only 3 days a week. I'll be home with them more than I'm not. It's good for me, good for them. Yet, I look at my snugglebug Joel and think of all the things I'll miss. Perhaps his first steps, expressions, laughter, tears and so many more things. Caleb, I'll miss taking him to school and picking him up. What if he needs his mommy to encourage him before his day starts? What if he wants Mommy to hold him after a long day? Amberly, what if her daddy doesn't have the patience she needs in the morning like her mommy has?
Ahh yes, but it's only 3 days.
I'm sure after I get this week behind me it will all be fine. Right?

A New School Year Begins

Caleb woke this morning asking "Who's day is it today Mommy?" This question is asked countless times before bed and first thing in the morning. Disappointment and complaining rang out this morning when he was informed that today was a school day. He seemed sad and told me that he didn't want to go to school FOREVER! I was sad for him, I didn't tell him that he would be in school for years and years to come, because I knew that would only make that moment worse, and for me, I'm having a hard time letting go of my boy. It's hard watching him walk into a world of school where I can't protect him and hold him close to my side to shelter him from anything that could go wrong. I know that this is all apart of growing up. I know that he will grow in knowledge not only in book sense, but in social skills and interactions. I also know that the things I've taught him will aid him in any situation and as long as I keep showering him with love, grace and understanding he will be a remarkable boy and man. I want to encourage him to be a stand out follower of Christ, and even though he's only 4 (going on 5 soon) innocence and obedience says a lot to an outsider looking in.
My Boy, Senior Kindergarten looks good you.

September? Where Did You Come From?

It showed up and moved in without any warning. September arrived and is here. I'm definitely not crazy about it. I'm a very routine person, my kids thrive on routine, but September requires skillful routine which is going to be a hard transition. School starts again next week. Caleb again is indifferent to this idea. We visited Walmart today, it was a scary zoo, so the quick "grab and get out" was initiated by the mean mom (me) who doesn't let her children look at toys. But they were good about it after I explained to them that there was just way too many people for us to even see such fun things. So the markers and glue sticks and hand soap that was purchased was nothing very exciting for my son. When people ask him about school, he gets a bit huffy and says "yes, I go back againnnnnn". He even asked me the other day "Mommy, how long do I have to go to school?" I sighed, poor thing, he's got a looonnngg way to go!
September also means the return to work from my maternity leave. I'm a little down in the dumps over this as I have thoroughly enjoyed my maternity leave. Joel is my angel and we have a special bond, I find it will be really tough letting him go for 3 days. Yes, 3 days a week is all that I'll be working, so that's the bright side of things really! With only working part time, I get the best of both worlds I believe. My co-workers have all told me they are excited for me to come back, I can't say I share in their enthusiasm but it will be nice to have adult conversation more regularly. Returning to work means, childcare which means more organizing in the mornings, evenings and everything in between. I'm sure we will all adjust, but those first few weeks will be a little hectic.
Gone are those lazy days of summer, the days where p.j.'s were still worn past noon, where little girls hair wasn't even combed, crawling into bed after lunch for a little nap was a must. I can say goodbye to those opportunities and begin to search for those slow moments and soak in them as long as they last.
Don't ever wish away a day. Don't.