Oh My, My New Favourite Song!

Christmas Come and Gone

Wow, it always amazes me how quickly Christmas disappears. You spend weeks and weeks, preparing, orgnazing, shopping, baking, wrapping, decorating, for one day to leave for the next day before you know it. I have a slight sadness thinking of how quickly the time went by.
(Joel's first Christmas!)

We had a great time while it lasted though. The kids had a blast. They still are discovering the joy of their new things. In my eye (the parent's eye) the kids did great, we didn't get a whole lot of new toys. They got needed clothes and some movies, books and games. Amberly mostly got dress up clothes which she loves and Caleb got a the Leapster 2 which although educational, is also a new obsession! ha ha ha. I was spoiled too. My hubby got me a heated blanket and new Mary Kay products, his parents got me some socks, a book and a gift card to the mall. Sally had my name this year and she got me new pink pj's which I love, broke them in last night. The new Casting Crowns cd and more socks.


Today I was looking forward to such a nice quiet day. Caleb and Amberly were supposed to go to Christa's but she called this morning saying her daughter was sick :( I'm afraid I'm in for a long day here. Dave is heading to Buffalo for a World Junior game and probably won't be home until after midnight. Oh well. We'll see how adventurous I feel. I was going to go to Toys R Us today to pick something up for Joel as his uncle gave him a gift card for there, but doing that alone with 3 kids may just be a little insane!

Fun in the Snow

While out at my parents, the kids, big and small, got bundled up to have fun in the blustery snow. Drifts are the best for tunnel making. The big boys were digging the tunnels while the little ones enjoyed crawling threw.
This picture has a little story. Benji was working hard at digging a long tunnel. He was at one end while Dave went to the other and the 2 of them worked at digging to reach in the middle. Caleb went running to get to his cousin and fell through the tunnel onto his uncle Benji's head. Caleb was a little shocked and almost in tears while Dave killed himself laughing and Benji was confused!

Goodbye for Now

Goodbye Disney Car pull-ups. Caleb turned 4 and decided he didn't need you anymore to aid in his sleep. So long for now. (Maybe you'll appeal to Amberly one day soon - I hope)

Christmas is Coming!

Christmas is just around the corner now. I think we're pretty much ready. I still have a few things to make food wise, but other than that, bring it on. I love Christmas, the opportunity to see family, to give (I love giving) but most importantly, to celebrate the greatest gift God ever bestowed - His son. It's hard to teach our kids the real reason for Christmas and what is most important to celebrate, when our world we live in is hung up on the possessions that money can buy, and if you don't have the money, then the debt that it's o.k. to go in. I admit, when shopping I want to go overboard and spoil our kids because I can't help but love them so much and want everything for them. But this is the year it's going to count. Caleb is old enough to understand, and so it's time to set in place a standard when it comes to gifts. This year Dave and I got each babe 3 presents. After settling on this number, I heard a lady say that she always got her children 3 presents, just as Jesus received 3, and I loved that idea. This will be our standard. 3 is plenty.
The kids are excited for Christmas to come. They are counting down the sleeps. Below is a picture of my 2 little helpers baking some cookies.

Here are my 2 handsome young men!

Boy, is it ever hard to get a nice picture of 3 little ones all looking at the camera. It didn't happen, but this is sweet enough!

And here's my gorgeous girl. All dressed up in her Christmas dress.

Ooooh, it's just so soon! The anticipation and excitment is starting to fill my heart!

My Four Year Old

Four years have gone by so quickly. I can't believe I entered into the world of motherhood 4 years ago. It seems long ago but at the same time, looking at Caleb, it went so fast. He's my sweetheart. He's kind, and loving. Has the cute timid smile. He's all boy. Loves his monster trucks, Disney's Cars, is found constantly making boy noises. He teases and beats up on his sister. Wants to wrestle and asks to be tickled. Stalls at bedtime, and wants to sleep in. Asks me to carry his school bag, but once we turn the corner towards his class, he insists he carrys it. He excitedly shares what he ate from his lunch in a day. Repeats "I don't know" when asked about anything other than his lunch at school. Sings to himself his songs he learned at school. He eagerly asks to read the Cubbie bear stories (Awana) at night before bed. Puts on a shy smile when about to ask to play the xbox. All these and more are things I want to treasure in my heart always.

To celebrate Caleb's birthday, we split it up over 2 parties. We had one party with my side of the family in O'ville at Stephen and Sally's house. Then on his actual birthday day, we had Dave's side plus a few friends over. Caleb felt pretty special but was really tired when it was all over. He was given many wonderful things and enjoys all of them.
Happy Birthday my wonderful son, I love you so much!

Amberly's ABC's

This is so funny. Her face is the best, you can tell the concentration it takes to say the alphabet!

Caleb's Concert

I took a video of our performing boy. He's pretty darn cute. So is all the little ones! Don't worry this isn't one class, this is 3 classes of kids!

Busy Weekend Begins

Yes, I think this is our busiest weekend. Today we have my work Kids Christmas party, then we head out to O'ville for a combined birthday party celebrating Krista's and Caleb's. Tomorrow we have the normal church and in the afternoon we have a friend's Christmas party to attend. Monday we're having friends and family over to celebrate Caleb's birthday. I'm providing dinner, so I need to get the food all in order as well as clean up our house AND hopefully make enough time so I can go to my department Christmas lunch that day!

This past Thursday Caleb had his first Christmas concert. It was so cute. He got to wear a "blinkin' nose". We saw the pediatrician last thursday. Caleb had to get a chest x-ray done as well as blood tests. The poor little guy, he doesn't understand what's going on, but he's so brave. He didn't even cry when they took his blood. We go back on this coming Thursday to see what happens next, if anything. Some explainations were shared that left Dave and I worried for our little guy, so keep us in your prayers.

Joel is doing great, he's had 3 nights now where he slept 8 hours. I'm very excited about this, however, I have yet to sleep that. I kept getting up to check on him and then pretty much laid there waiting for him to make a noise or wake up! It will come, this is a good sign of long nights to come....right?!?!

Amberly keeps putting on her best show for Christa, doing the whole potty thing for her. But for us....not a chance! I'm still at the place where I don't care, I just don't have time or the patience (which is sleep related) to persist with her. I know she can do it, it's just a matter of her wanting to be a big girl for her mommy!

Anyway, I hear a little bit of chatter upstairs. I'm looking forward to our full weekend, I just hope I don't get stressed out about it all!

Depraved Indifference

If you have the time, I would encourage you to listen to this and ask yourself, what are you willing to do? Anything?



It brought tears to my eyes and broke my heart. We have to stand up. I have to stand up.

Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.
Yep, I love seeing the white stuff fall down and blanket the ground. It's a peaceful reminder that Christmas is coming. Caleb also reminds us that his birthday is coming. I guess it wasn't the greatest idea to tell him (back in July) that when the snow falls means his birthday is here. Now every time he sees it snow, he asks when can he have presents for his birthday?? ha ha ha. Soon it will be close enough to tell him how many sleeps it is!
To teach our kids the importance of giving, and helping those who are in great need, both Caleb and Amberly filled a shoebox for Operation Christmas Child. Not only is it a wonderful organization, but it allows us the chance to teach our kids how lucky they really are, and how it's important to share and give to those little ones who have nothing.
We decked our halls last weekend, and we're so pleased with the outcome.

A good time was had by all, except the littlest one. This guy has the cutest sad face ever!


Our weeks seem to be flying by with activities and the comings and goings of everyone. Caleb has school on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and every other Friday. Amberly goes to Christa's on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Caleb has swimming on Wednesday afternoons. I have small group Wednesday nights. Amberly has swimming Saturday mornings. The kids go to Awana on Thursday nights. It's probably just a glimpse of what scheduling will look like in a couple more years - Crazy!

Caleb and Amberly love going to Awana. I'm amazed at how well Caleb does memorizing scriptures. This week's verse is "Jesus said, Friend, your sins are forgiven." Caleb has it almost except instead of saying forgiven he says, "your sins are coming" it sounds pretty threatening coming from a 3 (soon to be 4) year old!

Our xbox died conveniently a couple of weeks ago. Dave figured the cost to have it fixed would almost be the cost of a new one. So we broke down and got a new one. With the new Kinect of course. Caleb loves it. We all are enjoying, I think my favourite part is watching Caleb play. I loved it so much, I had to tape it and share with you!

Love will Hold Us Together

Make us a Shelter to Weather the Storm


Matt Maher is a new favourite.....

News

Lots has been happening in our household and I feel like time is just slipping away. Almost every day there is something going on or has to get done and by the time I reach the evening hours I'm done! Here's a little update of how things are going.

Caleb is still loving school. Dave and I had a parent teacher interview last week and she is quite please with how well Caleb has adjusted, as if he's been doing it for a long time. I also went in for an observation this week and sat and watched their activity time. Caleb ignored me. I called him over and asked about the toy he was playing with and he approached me and then turned away! Oh dear, at least I know he's feeling comfortable there. When Joel was born Caleb developed a swollen gland on his left side. When we took Joel in for his 5 day check, the doctor examined Caleb and measured the size of the gland. She wanted to see him back again when we took Joel for his 1 month. We did that yesterday and because the gland hasn't gone back to normal we've been referred to a pediatrician and we have to have an ultrasound done on it. The doctor told me not to be too worried about it. I just worry, that's what I do best!

Amberly is my handful. The past two weeks I've been struggling with finding ways to discipline her effectively. So far everything I've tried doesn't work. I'm about ready to just tie her up to something and leave her there. I know that she's acting out because of Joel. But at the same time I think it's also a girl thing. She's not using the potty just BECAUSE!!! She will poop on it, or she'll just poop in her diaper just to get a reaction. This I've learned from and now I don't react!

Joel is doing lovely. I've successfully got him on a schedule with out any problems. He is a gassy guy, so he's fussy a lot of the time. But our nights are getting better he's sleeping solidly from his last feed at 10pm to 2am. At his 1 month check up he now weighs 11lbs 11oz and is 23.6 inches long. He's smiling at us and when awake he's so alert.

Dave and I are doing well, settling into a routine of parenting 3 kids. We seemed to have turned a corner where we can actually get some time for ourselves in the evenings again when the kids are in bed. We're busy with church things through the week, but have no other commitments outside of that so we do have more free time together. He went to Promise Keepers yesterday and stayed the night and will be home today sometime. I was nervous to be home alone at night with all 3 kids. But I did o.k. I may go to bed at 7pm tonight, but I did o.k.

I better run and check on the kids now.

Halloween Fun

This year Halloween seemed like a blur. We did manage to get to the pumpkin patch to pick out our pumkins, but failed to carve them this year. I'm o.k. with that, and the kids didn't seem to have missed anything. Caleb was the elephant again this year and Amberly was a kitty cat. Joel was a skeleton. This wasn't my first choice, but only choice as I left it until last minute.



The neighbours down the street went all out and the kids enjoyed looking at all the stuff.


We only did 1 side of 2 streets. It was so cold out, by the time we made it to our finish, I was so glad! We ended at our friends place where a little party was planned. We each brought some appetizers and Christa organized a few games for the little ones. It was a blast, everyone had a great time! Overall I think there were 10 children under the age of 5 at the festivities!


The party was such a hit that it will be a definate thing for years to come. Above is the game the kids loved (even us big ones) where we had to eat donuts without the use of our hands!

One Month Already!

It's hard to believe that a month has already passed by. Joel is so alert, he's smiling now and he has developed a face of his own. We've successfully got him on a schedule where he feeds at 10-2-6 around the clock. I'm so pleased to have been able to do that without any problems. The only issue we do have is he's pretty gassy. The poor little guy gets very fussy in the evenings and sometimes to my dismay, this can carry on through out the whole night. No sleep can be very difficult. He loves bath time too, this is usually the time he talks and smiles at Mommy.

He sure is a keeper.

Romance and Longing

We used to have a set time at 9:30pm every single night where we would meet. I would get wrapped in warmth, comfort, and always felt at ease and in the perfect safe place. He would make me feel loved, rejuvenated, happy, relaxed and at peace. Without him I'm feeling lost.

I am talking about my romantic involvement with Sleep. I miss and long to be reunited with him.

We've been finding ways to sneak away and be with each other. I anxiously run around after lunch time rushing the kids to nap so that I may have the same pleasure. I find a way to rekindle some rest in the car if Dave is driving, even if it's only 5 or 10 mins. I even went as far as to being risky and actually fell into the arms of my sleep while in the bath tub.

I feel like I'm falling apart with out my Sleep. I miss and long for him every day. After the dinner hour comes and goes, I get a bit of an anxiety wondering what my night will be like and how much time will be stolen from Sleep and I.

As much as I love my little Joel, and want to treasure every moment of his precious life, deep down I will always have a flame for sleep and a longing to be reunited to him at my regular time of 9:30pm with out any interruptions until at least 7am!

I'm in love with Sleep.

Joel

Love his stretches.
Content in the swing.
My Kiddies and I.
He's pretty precious.
Love his toes.

Thanksgiving

Lots to be thankful for this year. It was a nice weekend. Saturday we had Dave's family over for dinner. Because of the timing and things being crazy, we ordered a big chinese meal for our dinner. It was perfect, I haven't had chinese in a long time! Sunday it was just my little family. We took Joel to church for the first time. In the afternoon we took the kids out for a nice walk along one of the trails here. Monday we headed to my parents for the day. We celebrated both my Dad and brother's birthdays and had a nice turkey dinner. Here are a few pictures of our weekend....




Would have some more, but having trouble with uploading the pic's....

Joel Benjamin

I just thought I would tell the story of Joel's birth to help me remember the details for later down the road.

Starting on Wednesday Sept. 29th, I had a doctor's appt. with my ob. He checked me and I was 3-4cms. This time he told me that he added my name on the list to be induced Thursday in the hospital. This was followed by the statement that it may not happen if the hospital is busy, but a non-stress test would be in order if I don't. I was instructed to call the hospital Thursday morning before 7:30am. I continued through the day making arrangements for the kids and getting everything ready, all the while still preparing myself that Thursday may not be the day.

Thursday morning rolled around and I started the day out normally, waking up at 6:50am and getting the kids ready to go to Christa's. It was about 7:15am when I decided to get the phone and number ready to call the hospital. Just as I was doing that, the phone rang and it was the hospital calling to ask me to come in. My emotions were going nuts as I scrambled to get myself, the kids and Dave ready for the day where all life was about to change. We got the kids to the sitters for 8am and from there went to the hospital. We got there around 8:30am. We got registered and our nurse came to greet us and take us to the delivery room where she had me strip down into a gown and find a comfortable position on the bed. Our nurse's name was Judy. She informed me that Dr. Anstett just went into a scheduled c-section, so he wouldn't be in until later to break my water. In the meantime she started me on oxytocin to get contractions going. That didn't really make much of a difference for me, I couldn't really feel anything. My doctor came in around 11am and broke my water, and increased the drip. This brought on some very painful contractions. They were so low down and brought tears to my eyes everytime they happened. I lasted maybe 1.5 hours with this pain. Both my nurse and Dave were so quiet, I had on either side of me, them reading their magazines, while I was left alone with nothing distracting me but that pain. Finally my nurse looked at me and saw me crying and asked if I would like the epidural now. "YES PLEASE" was my response! It was maybe 12:45 when I received that. Which was painful in itself, but what magic it was. Once I had that, I was able to just sit back and relax! The nurse checked me at 4:30 and told me that I was ready, fully dilated and the head was right there. Another nurse named Brenda then came in. (Brenda was my nurse for Caleb and Amberly, she knew I was there, so she said she might as well be present for my 3rd too!) Both nurses chatted and called my doctor who was in his office. It would take him 5 mins. to come, and Judy said to Brenda, "He may be mad at me for calling him because I know he likes to see the ears when he comes in" Brenda then told her that she will get me to push just once to at least tell the doctor that I was pushing. So they had me push once. Then I heard Brenda tell Judy "well, he'll be happy now" implying that the ears were there! This was all so bizarre to me, because with Caleb, when it was time to push I could feel the severe pressure down below and my whole body was trembling. This time I could feel just a tiny bit of pressure, and that was it! Dr. Anstett came in and they had me push once. Then they had me push twice, and presto, Joel entered the world! I couldn't believe it, I kept saying "No way, No way!" Brenda took him over to clean him up and then my tears started to flow. It was so quiet in the room, with only 5 adults there, something I was so not expecting. The doctor continued to work below, I had torn a bit I guess. While he was stitching me up, he and Dave were talking about the 4th baby. Brenda piped up and said this was not the time to be having these discussions men!
It was just an amazing experience this time. God was with me the whole time. The kids came in with Dave's parents to meet their new little brother. The night went well with the young nurse I had. And we were able to get out in the morning. We were home by 11am Friday. My parents had stayed with the kids. Everyone is adjusting still.
Caleb seems to be having the most problems with Joel. He acts out and whines a lot. He's not his normal sweet self. But in time I know he'll come around. Amberly loves her baby brother. Often gives kisses and wants to look at him, and so far that's it, no threat of harm coming from her yet!
I'm adjusting o.k. One of the questions everyone asks me is if I'm nursing. I'm not. I told myself I would try, and I did. I did in the hospital and for the first full day at home and that was it. The memory of what I went through with Caleb came back, and fear of not knowing how much Joel was eating. My breaking point was when I was nursing and both Caleb and Amberly were in their bed crying out for mommy, and I couldn't go to them. Once I decided to make the switch, the wieght on my shoulders was gone and I felt a greater confidence in myself. Nursing is not for me. I know people would call me selfish for saying that. Believe me, I have suffered the guilt over it, and cried enough over it. But the bottom line is, Joel is thriving and happy and so is mommy.
Well, I could go on and on about Joel and what a good baby he is. We are lucky to get 4 hour stretches from him through the night. His fussy times are in the evening before our bedtime, where he seems to want to eat every 2 hours. But I'm o.k. with that. I do feel anxious each night wondering what he'll do, and if I'll get sleep. But again, the Lord has been truly good to me, and Joel has been amazing.
I better go, need to spend some time with Dave.

Again, Still Waiting.....

It's Sunday evening and this little guy still remains to make a grand entrance. With each morning I wake up asking God if today will be the day, "please may it be today". By the time noon rolls around, the frustration starts to sink in, and my feelings of being uncomfortable are magnified, and I just wish it was time. Then by the time dinner is over and bed time routines begin and end, I sit and relax after the kids are tucked in now able to accept that today was in fact not the day. But begin to hope that I will get one more nights rest in before the big event.

This has been what my last 4 or 5 days have been like. I ride these emotional hills, and I'm tired of doing it.

Thursday's appt. was uneventful (as you may see) My ob entered the room with a regrettable tone declaring that it won't happen tonight with his help because the hospital was crazy busy, and there was a waiting list of women who needed to be induced. Deep down I felt that this was probably a normal story that he can tell, I have no idea otherwise right? He proceeded to check me, in the week since he last saw me, nothing changed. I was still 2-3 cm's dilated. This time he caused a little more pain as he stretched my cervix in hopes that this would help my water to break on it's own sooner than later. I left with another appt. booked for this coming Wednesday and feeling pretty discouraged.

From how he describes it, I understand why I couldn't be induced last week. They can't use the normal methods of drugs to induce such as cervidil, that they would give and then have you do whatever to wait for active labour. Because they will only induce by breaking my water, that requires a labour room, it's not like they can just break it and wait for something to happen. Then Dave has a buddy whose wife was on that waiting list to be induced last week, and he told him that there was "like 100 babies" born in those past few days.

I am really hoping that I won't make it until Wednesday, deep down I do hope things will begin naturally on their own. I never anticipated being pregnant still. I my mind I would have had this baby over a week ago already. Now the idea of him holding on for October is threatening me!